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Fieldnotes

by Renny Field

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1.
The Mission 05:13
Caught out the back of nowhere and the window is jammed, I got more hope than a beggar but somewhat less than your average man And I guess I was headed to someplace but it sure ain't where I am, where I am It's the same old scene, it's quarantine, I'm frozen here in time Yeah if Satan knows I'm living I hope Jesus knows I'll die And maybe somewhere in the next life I'll get a chance to put things right, to put things right Oh god I'm doing what I can, Help me switch a light on, help me understand Where the hell did I go wrong, this was not the mission, this was not the plan Maybe I'm not living to the letter of the law but I'm morally intact so why'm I still on this prison floor All this self-interrogation gets me down I can take no more, take no more They say money don't make you happy but it sure makes you feel good And I don't give a damn about being rich but maybe I damn well should And I always said I'd never sell my soul but right now I think I could, I know I could Oh god I'm doing what I can... Far too often do I wander, far too often do I fall I'm tired of dragging myself under, tired of coming back for more This was not the mission, this was not the plan And I'm praying that tomorrow I'm gonna wake up feeling fine, but experience has taught me that praying is a waste of time Still I've come this far already and I'm not about to tow the fecking line, tow the fecking line Oh god I'm doing what I can... This was not the plan
2.
Half a man 03:41
Get in my boat, we're hitting the road I'm sailing you to the moon I don't care, just where we go As long as we go soon Cause I don't wanna float like a feather I don't wanna fall like the rain I just wanna hold you forever I just wanna feel loved again Jump in my car, we'll tour the stars I'll drive you 'cross the sea I don't care, just where we are As long as you're with me Cause I don't wanna float like a feather I don't wanna fall like the rain I just wanna hold you forever I just wanna feel loved again Life is in the timing, we don't always get to choose The things that take some finding are the hardest things to lose And I don't need reminding that one and one makes two But I'm just half a man without you So get on my plane, we sail today We'll roll through space and time I don't care, just where we stay As long as you stay mine Cause I don't wanna float like a feather I don't wanna fall like the rain I just wanna hold you forever I just wanna feel loved again I just wanna hold you forever I just wanna feel loved again
3.
It's no use having second thoughts The die was cast, you took your chance, You're doin' the time you bought If only there were ways, if only there were means That we could see the future and whatever it brings So tilt your head, lend me your ear So I can whisper nothings that mean something to you dear Be my Cindarella, come with me to the ball Cause I don't wanna dance around these feelings any more I sure know what we had, now I don't know if it's gone You thought that I was leaving, but I was holding on A part of me stayed with you each and every time Now I just wanna love you, I wanna make you mine You didn't know, I didn't dare Cause I was on a boat and baby you were in the air If only there were ways, if only there were means That we could turn back time and I could say some different things I sure know what we had, now I don't know if it's gone... I had my chances to let you see But those same old fears took a hold of me Now I've gotta give you the time that's yours While I keep on doing the time I bought I sure know what we had, now I don't know if it's gone... It's no use having second thoughts, The die was cast, you took your chance You're doin' the time you bought
4.
That morning 04:38
Take me back to that morning, when you had just arrived The wind through the door and the sun on the floor And the lives we were leaving behind How was I to know that I'd become yours Lord I wish that you were still mine Take me back to that morning, when I had just touched down You standing there with your heart laid bare When I was just passing through town How was i to know you'd come with me Lord I wish that you were still around I gave you all my love girl, I left it all behind I traded it in for loneliness but she ain't no friend of mine I thought I saw the picture, but the winter left me blind Of just give me a chance at redemption Give me a chance to make it right Take me back to that morning, when we had just made plans In that split-level room where I waited for you And I put my heart in your hands How was i to know you would have held on forever Lord I wish that there was still a chance I gave you all my love girl.... Oh just give me a chance to start over Give me a chance to make it right I gave you all my love girl.... Of just Give me a chance to hold on to you Give me a chance to make it right Take me back to that morning, when you had just arrived The wind through the door and the sun on the floor And the lives that we were leaving behind How was I to know what you'd mean to me Lord I wish that we were still alive
5.
Rhythm 02:55
You can get a rhythm from a heartbeat, you can get a beat from a drum, But a rhythm's gonna make that groove sweet and your heart's gonna make you numb, these are some of life's idiosyncrasies and I don't understand them all, but if you're falling in love or your keeping the beat, you better have time for more... You can get drunk when you're taking shots and you can take shots with a gun, but drinking too much is gonna kill you man and people shoot things for fun, these are some of life's idiosyncrasies and I don't understand them all, but if you're shooting to kill or you're hitting the drink you better have time for more... And I don't pretend to know it all, but I've paid enough attention, I've kept track of the score, and I feel the better for my sins but if my wicked ways come knockin' I will not let 'em in. And I don't pretend to have a good plan, but I'm tryin' to hold my own, and I'm tryin' to be a good man, and I feel the love beneath my skin, oh this here ain't the ending, it's just where it begins, it's just where it begins... You can win a game with a home run, you can run home from a game, but heading home makes you feel good and winning just ain't the same, these are some of life's idiosyncrasies and I don't understand them all, but if you're trying to live by trying to win you'll never have time for more.. You can get a rhythm from a heartbeat, you can get a beat from a drum. But a rhythm's gonna make that groove sweet and your heart's gonna make you numb. These are some of life's idiosyncrasies and I don't understand them all. But whatever you do, you better have time for more.
6.
Everybody got a situation, everybody got a hungry mind, no time for hesitation, don't you get left behind Boy you're gonna end up lonely, boy you're gonna end up sad, boy you better take it slowly before you lose the best things you had, the best things you had Everybody got a constitution, everybody got a wounded soul, no time to find solutions, you'll get there with what you know Boy you're gonna end up lonely, boy you're gonna end up sad, boy you better take it slowly before you lose the best things you had, the best things you had Don't you want somebody to love you, don't you want somebody to care, don't you know the heaven above you hope like hell you're gonna end up there. Don't you know I'm trying to help you, don't you know I understand, don't need a premonition to tell you're about to lose the best things you had, the best things you had Everybody got a grand illusion, everybody got a foolish dream, caught up in your confusion, things are never what they seem. Boy you're gonna end up lonely, boy you're gonna end up sad, boy you better take it slowly before you lose the best things you had, the best things... Don't you want somebody to love you, don't you want somebody to care, don't you know the heaven above you is praying to god you're gonna end up there. Don't you know I'm trying to help you, don't you know I understand, don't need a premonition to tell you're about to lose the best things you had, the best things you had the best things you had
7.
All the love 04:19
I heard the voices, talking loud and clear, and I made my choices, I was running away from here From all the love I wanted, from all the love I need, from all the love I wanted, a love I could believe Part of the ending is walking again, but there's no use pretending that you didn't just lose a friend. But the wheels were in motion, and the words they rang true, yeah I tore myself open when I ran away from you From all the love I wanted, from all the love I need, from all the love I wanted, a love that was meant for me, meant for me But the wheels were in motion and the words they rang true, yeah I tore us both open when I ran away from you Now I hear the voices talking loud and clear, and I'll make my choices, I'm not running away from here. From all the love I wanted, from all the love I need, from all the love I wanted, a love I could believe I'll give you all the love you wanted, I'll give you all the love you need, I'll give you all the love you wanted, a love that's for you and me, for you and me, all the love we need, I'll give you all the love you wanted, a love you can believe.
8.
Start again 03:47
There are lines I've crossed, there is love I've lost Help me start again I guess I should have known, when I let you go The good love never ends There are things I said, turned the living into dead But somehow the dead still breathes There are ghost I find in the corners of my mind Thoughts that will never leave I don't see the reason, I don't hear the rhyme I told you this would be forever The changing of the seasons, the fullness of the time What if we were here together I don't see the reason, I don't hear the rhyme Yes I told you this would be forever The changing of the seasons, the fullness of the time If only we were here together No I don't see the reason, I don't hear the rhyme Oh tell me this won't be forever The changing of the seasons, the fullness of the time Is it better to be late or never There are lines I've crossed, there is love I've lost Help me start again
9.
Lifeline 04:15
Throw me a lifeline, reel me in, I've raised the white flag I'm confessing my sins I'm a little too old but I'm much too young Guess I gotta keep on running till the race has been run yeah There's a multitude of things that I don't understand How the winter turns to spring, how a woman loves a man That's just some of the shit that's way beyond my control And it's breeding confusion, it's taking its toll It's breeding confusion, it's taking its toll If I fall down will you come to my aid When I don't have the strength to be strong I won't call out till I need to be saved, Just don't make me wait too long Wait too long There's a degree of precision, there's an element of skill That you need to take aim, to move in for the kill But killing ain't easy, you gotta get it right from the start And the target keeps moving, it's breaking my heart yeah I've been a creature of habit since the day I was born I wish the habits would fade just like the clothes that I've worn I'm trying to change and I'm trying to learn But it's hard to stoked the fire without getting burned It's hard to stoke the fire without getting burned If I fall down.... Yeah this kind of existence it don't come cheap But the price of resistance could be the end of me And I'm hoping the chickens ain't coming home to roost But what the hell can i do I was the one who cut 'em loose yeah And I know I'm not perfect, I may have done wrong I tried looting the wreckage just to get what I want Now the hour is coming where my karma returns And I'm begging for mercy I do not deserve I'm begging for Mercy I'm surveying the damage, I'm counting up the cost But the shit I need most is the same shit I've lost I'm wasting my time, let's finish this now I won't pull the trigger but I'll show you how I won't pull the trigger but I'll show you how I've fallen down will you come to my aid Cause I don't have the strength to be strong I'm calling out cause I need to be saved Just don't make me wait too long I've fallen down.... Just don't make me wait too long Wait too long
10.
If my love returns to me, I'm gonna make it right A flame that cannot burn me, a windproof candlelight Pick me up cause I'm breaking down You know I really need you, I need you now And I'll hold you in if we're falling out I'll do what I can to keep you around If my love returns to me, I'm gonna make it better I won't rest till I hold the key and I'm gonna hold on forever Pick me up cause I'm breaking down... I'll do what I can to keep you around I'm old enough, I'm strong enough To wait my turn for some of the good stuff This could be the end of me, If love don't come to fill me up I don't need a reason for living, but I still gotta know If I believe in what you're giving, tell me you're not gonna go I don't need a reason for living, but I still gotta know If I believe in what you're giving, promise you're not gonna go You're not gonna go I said if my love returns to me, I'm gonna make it good I won't rest till it won't leave, I'll do all the things I should Pick me up cause I'm breaking down... I'll do what I can to keep you around I'll do what I can...
11.
Breathless 04:15
This ain't the time to up and run To head for the hills, to chase down the sun We might sink in the water, but let's take a dive You leave me breathless but you keep me alive It was late in the evening, one last chance for a meal Yeah we ate from the packet, but what we tasted was real On the beaches of nowhere, we made tracks in the sand Oh just tell me your wish and it'll be my command My command I sent you homeward, you waved goodbye There were miles in between us, there were mountains to climb I was running on empty with not a second to lose I was waiting for something, I was waiting for you All the places we've seen and the times that we've shared The smell of the ocean, the chill of the air Can we be children, can we be fools Can we give this a chance, can we break all the rules Can we break all the rules Can we be children, can we be fools Can we give this a chance, can we break all the rules This ain't the time to up and run, to head for the hills, to chase down the sun We might sink in the water, but let's take a dive You leave me breathless but you keep me alive
12.
Perfect 06:20
Everything is perfect now, it's just the way I planned The rolling hills, the little house, safely in my hands Still I search for answers, still I sail the seas But look what I've got right in front of me Everything is perfect now, it's just the way I'd seen it The sun it shines right through the clouds, I feel the love I needed Still I search for meaning, still I roam the streets But look what I've got right in front of me Everything is perfect now, it's just what I had hoped for The air is clear, the stars are out, my tired heart is no more Still I wait for answers, still I long to be But look what I've got right in front of me I have taken chances, I have come to see All that I've got right in front of me

credits

released May 8, 2012

All songs written by Renny Field. © Renny Field, 2012.
Produced by Kent Eastwood. Mixed by KE & RF.
Recorded at Grey St Studios, Glen Innes,
and Soundstone, Avalon, NSW, Australia.
Mastered by William Bowden.
www.rennyfield.com

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Renny Field Sunshine Coast, Australia

Renny Field is a singer-songwriter based on the Sunshine Coast. Over the course of some twenty years he has travelled and performed extensively, both at home and abroad, and been fortunate enough to share the stage with the likes of Diesel, Ian Moss, Mark Seymour, The Whitlams and many more. For updates and upcoming gigs, head over to Facebook and/or Instagram. Cheers 🙏 ... more

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